One whole decade

Caleb Riley 5/3/2000
6 lb 2 oz
18 1/2" long

I seriously have to get back into the habit of blogging. I find it...cathartic. I don't do it as often these days because now that I have an iPhone, I hardly spend any time on the "real" computer... not to mention the fact that I'm seriously depressed that my blog isn't as cute and clever as so many of the ones I read routinely. Have to work on that...

So today is a very important day. Today makes 10 years since the arrival of our precious first born, Caleb Riley. It is a day that I have looked forward to with a mix of emotions. Primarily, pride. My heart swells with pride for this boy. He is so gentle, so kind, so thoughtful, so funny, so talented, so witty, and most importantly, he is just such a good mix of the qualities I admire in the people I love. He was born during such a tender and emotional time, and holding him in our arms 10 years ago marked the end of one journey and the beginning of another. Caring for his precious soul has been the most impressive undertaking of my entire life, and I am extremely proud of the young man he is growing up to be.

I'm sad. Sad that the moments have gone by so fleetingly fast. Sad that we didn't celebrate more of the silly childlike moments with him and enjoy them while they lasted, because now they are gone. Sad that the memory of the way his chubby hands felt in mine while we walked together from place to place is fading. His hands are becoming larger, rougher, and are almost as big as mine. Sad that his legs are getting hairy and he has developed an interest in girls. Sad that he can do so many things without my help.

I'm hopeful. I see in his deep blue eyes, promise and potential. His athletic ability is astounding to me. The ways that his body moves around a soccer field or on the trampoline are incredible. He has such a propensity for kindness. He has always been so patient of a big brother to Hannah and is a very gentle soul. I know that his future holds great things.

I'm sentimental. We sat at dinner tonight talking about the day he was born. I tried to remember every last detail as if my life depended on it. The way I felt, the things I said, the people who were there, the events of the evening, I tried to wring out all of the details. Birth stories are always so special and unique, and I want to make sure he understands how loved he was before he was even born. We talked about the funny things he did when he was a baby... like the way he had to be put to sleep. Rodney would walk him around every night and we could always tell when he was about to fall asleep because he would sort of turn in his shoulders and get comfy on Rodney's chest. We talked about how his first word was ball. I told him that I should have known then that he would be such a dynamic athlete! The writing was on the wall! We talked about how special he was to all of the family, how they delighted in every single one of his days, and how thankful my granddad was that he had gotten to know him. If it hadn't been for Caleb, my granddad wouldn't have known any of his great grandkids.

He has been such an incredible little person to get to know and love. His tenth birthday makes me feel all kinds of things, but none of them compare to the joy that he has brought into our lives. Happy Birthday sweet boy! We love you forever and ever always.